Naruto Elements

A NWN Roleplaying Server based around the Naruto world. Set after the forging of the five great cities in an alternate timeline.
 
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 Life in the alley

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orcablaze



Posts : 5
Join date : 2017-05-05

PostSubject: Life in the alley   Sat May 13, 2017 4:56 am




Shun paced behind the bar of the Green Dragon, his eyes downcast as he almost glared at the floor. Geoffrey kept giving him strange looks from the side as he served customers their drinks, but said nothing. Shun looked young but he was still a business man in the works and wasn't afraid to dock pay for unnecessary comments.

It had been four months since his foster family had died and left the bar to him. Shun wasn't unhappy to recieve the bar, it generated quite a bit of money considering its location, and the patrons weren't exactly the boring sorts. Upright citizens of Kirigakure didn't generally stop by the seedy bar hidden in the shady back alley, so Shun usually saw some pretty interesting things go on inside. Geoffrey had been temporarily running the show until recently, Shun was learning the ins and outs of running the business and seemed to have a serious knack for making money that had the old man highly impressed. One thing was for sure, they wouldn't want for much.

The new sign had just been made to have his name plastered at the bottom. He had someone nailing it to the post outside now. It wasn't the bar or the patrons that had Shun pacing though, at least not this time. In two days Shun would be starting at the Shinobi Academy. He was specifically instructed by the Mizukage to keep his true nature private. Which meant he would have to work twice as hard to catch up to everyone. It was embarrassing if not infuriating. Why did he have to limit himself just for the whim of that woman? It wasn't as though he has chosen the way his body was made. Or the abilities the threads inside gave him.

Shun was smart though. He would find a way around that woman's orders in his own way. And he had an idea how. That would come.later though, now his mind was on how to set up the bars schedule while he was away. He trusted Geoffrey to be able to run things just fine for a time but Shun was a creature of habit and didn't like things changing. He wandered around the bar and watched some of his customers as they did their own things. A game of high stakes Shogi was going on in the back corner, perhaps he would go and watch that for now.

For the rest of the day his thoughts were on what life would be like whole he attended the academy and how he would begin his dull life as a combat medic shortly after.
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Taka



Posts : 150
Join date : 2017-05-06

PostSubject: Re: Life in the alley   Wed May 24, 2017 10:49 pm

Feedback: Well written. Short, but as long as it needs to be to deliver the story. I do hate verbosity. Appreciate the insight into Shun's personality and attitude.
Roleplay reward: 4 Tokens
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